2017: The closest it has been to my best year yet. Where some doors closed and others opened more than I could ever ask for. This year has been full of success, love and laughter… but it has come with its pitfalls.
I have always believed in the quote supposedly said by the revolutionary philosopher Karl Marx:
“Surround yourself with people who make you happy. People who make you laugh, who help you when you’re in need. People who genuinely care. They are the ones worth keeping in your life. Everyone else is just passing through.”
Gaining friendships for some people can be easy yet true friendship is rare to find. To top this, differentiating the two can be even harder. I for one know that I attract the wrong people easily and I can be blinded by their toxicity until something goes horribly wrong.
This year I took a bold step (I had a spare hour) to go through my social media and unfollow or unfriend people who I know I wouldn’t talk to in real life. I cut my following by over half and I’m left with Instagram and Snapchat stories that I actually watch or interact with – I know, how inspiring.
But it’s not only fake-friendships that I’m saying goodbye to.
After watching the Jim Carey sensation ‘Yes Man’ a few too many times as a teenager, I have found that I have said yes to more than I should have. I have let comments slide when I knew they were wrong. I have seen the people I love make terrible decisions and still accepted them for it.
If it happens once it’s a mistake, if it happens a second time it’s a choice and if it happens a third time it’s a habit.
When you see someone you should love with all your heart making mistakes time and time again without seeing that they’re doing anything wrong, you question what difference you can make. Will I ever say enough to make them change?
I’ve been independent from an age you probably shouldn’t be independent. Switching between two lives to please different people. It was nearly every other weekend that I was introduced to someone new. When meeting a lot of people in a short space of time it can be quite overwhelming for a child, so detaching myself from these new people numbed me from getting hurt.
I prevented myself from making an emotional connection with them because I knew I wouldn’t ever see them again. People walked in and out of my life so quickly. I can’t even remember their names, they’re just blurred faces to me now. It became part of my routine. I believed that if I was detached I wouldn’t get hurt.
Independence is a useful trait in terms of travelling alone, never getting bored of your own company or ever getting hurt from rejection. However, when you’re TOO independent you can struggle to let people in your life in the first place and why would you? That way you’ll never get hurt, right?
There’s never a right time to let someone out of your life. Yet, when you see moral crimes being made far too regularly I think that’s when you know. When you remember more bad times than good spent with them and you can’t realise if they’re lying or not when they speak to you.
I left 2017 surrounded by my favourite gal pals with my family in my heart and pure love on my mind. 2017 also left me with confusion, a heartache that no ex-boyfriend could ever leave me with but also with a small glimpse of hope that not all goodbyes are sad.
Peace and love,